Learning confidence lessons from the diamond and the dog.

Let's pretend for a moment that you can step outside of yourself and observe your everyday interactions with friends and acquaintances.

Does this person you are now observing convey confidence?

Does this individual appear to be engaged in co-created discussions, enjoyable to both?

Can you see any hint that this individual is holding back from expressing their authentic self?

Now observe this individual alone, or with family.

Is their behavior consistent with the personality conveyed while engaged in discussion with friends?

My definition of "confidence with true friendship" means always feeling we have license to be ourselves.

No ifs, ands, or buts about it. Do you agree?

If so, take a look back at the behaviors and feelings you witnessed as you observed yourself engaged with friends.

Do you feel you are free to just be you with your friends?

If you find yourself changing your behavior, personality, style of communication to match and/or better relate with your friends, first let me acknowledge your hard work in creating an alter ego, but second, let me lift your burden-You don't have to do that one minute longer!

There are two things in life, loved by most people: diamonds and dogs.

If we study what makes them so lovable, we can learn some really important lessons about being ourselves and feeling confident about who we are.

If you incorporate these lessons in your interactions with friends, you will feel more confident about being yourself, managing your personal boundaries, asking for what you need, and never settling, but always getting what you're looking for out of your friendships.

Diamonds
"Diamonds are a girl's best friend"

Now you guys stay with me here for a second because this applies to you as well.

Diamonds are strong, yet beautiful.

They endure any almost environmental condition.

They don't change shape or color no matter who's finger they're on.

Each one is unique in size, shape, weight and color and that's where the beauty comes in!

So what's the analogy?

These same characteristics can apply to you in your friendships!

You can be strong, yet beautiful, not change to suit each personality with whom you come into contact, and feel pride about expressing your own uniqueness-and these things will not only enable you to show your brilliant authentic self, but create true friendships that can endure despite any environmental pressures.

Got it?

Now let's talk about dogs…

Dogs
"A man's best friend"

Ladies, this applies to you as well.

Any dog lover can list a hundred reasons why a dog is so well loved.

Dogs are unconditionally accepting, always forgiving, loving, fun, playful, easy to understand and always confident about being themselves and doing whatever the heck it is they please!

The analogy here is in the emotional qualities that enable us to truly engage with and enjoy our interactions with others.

What friendship wouldn't blossom with acceptance, forgiveness, fun, understanding and love?

In summary then, be like a resilient diamond and confidently express your own unique brilliance, but be also like our beloved doggies-engage authentically and love unconditionally.

Expect the same in return from others, and make a clear decision about how you will both communicate with and handle those who fail to deliver these things to you.

This is the way to healthy, strong confident friendships!